You have well said, “I have no husband,” for you have had five husbands and the one you are with now is not your husband John 4:17
Well that was kind of a jerk move. Here Jesus is, in Samaria, subverting gender norms by talking to a woman, subverting class norms by talking to a Samaritan, subverting religious norms by talking to a sinner. They engage in conversation. He offers her living water. She responds affirmatively. Then bam. He drops the, you had five husbands bomb. Was that necessary- couldn’t that “let me throw your sin back in your face, haha” moment have been left out?
The woman has been through a lot. Clearly she knew that she was a sinner. Everyone knew she was a sinner. Why did she get water at noon when no one else got water? Because everyone knew she was a sinner. They had plenty of things to say to her, behind her, about her, about how she was a sinner. I think she wanted a break, to be free from those stares, from the judgements, from the profound loneliness that particularly seems to surface in a big crowd. So what’s the deal, Jesus? Was that necessary?
I imagine that a woman who has had five husbands is looking for something. Looking for love, maybe? Looking to be known through and through and still be loved? Looking for someone who is willing to take care of her?
The timing is pivotal. Jesus brings up the issue of five husbands after he already offered her the living water and after she already said that she wanted it. She must have had a nagging at the back of her brain, she must have been thinking something like, Shoot, I need to get this living stuff fast, before the crowds show up and enlighten him on who I am. I think Jesus was proving that he knew all the lurid details of her life and had made the offer anyways. He knew her through and through and still loved her. I also think Jesus knew that there is power in naming fear and in naming sin. I think Jesus wanted to release her from her perceived secret so that she could be free to have a real relationship with Him.
Notice that Jesus doesn’t follow up his statement with a big fat So come back when you ditch the guy. Nor does he say Never talk to men again. In fact, the people she first brings back to Jesus are men. Her biggest area of insecurity and hurt was given to Christ and he gave it back new and renewed. He transformed her into a leader, a mover and a shaker who like Jesus, crossed gender and class and religious norms to bring fresh, flowing, living water into the lives of others.
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